“Love addicts assign too much value, time, and attention to another person, while neglecting to care for or value themselves. Focus on the partner is obsessive and fear of abandonment drives the obsession. Love addicts can be addicted to anyone: lover, spouse, friend, parent, or child. It is a painful process that negatively impacts not only the love addict, but also the individuals with whom he or she is in relationships.
Conversely, the love avoidant systematically uses relational walls during intimate contact in order to prevent feeling overwhelmed by the other person, associating “love” with duty or work. The love avoidant’s greatest fear is that of vulnerability. The focus is on interrupting the destructive cycles of both the love addict and the love avoidant, helping them learn to find intimacy with healthy boundaries.”
-exert from Pia Mellody’s work on Love Addiction/Love Avoidance
